Every day… Every moment of every day Things Happen. Life Happens.
And sometimes those things that happen, well, they leave you wondering… Wondering sometimes on a grand scheme:
What is happening with the Universe?
On a slightly smaller scale:
What’s wrong with the World?
On a smaller scale still:
Look at this Country of ours!
On a more local scale:
What the hell is going on in this City?
Or, on a personal scale:
Am I really who I think I am?
I have to say, since my Birthday (And yes, thank you everyone for the recent wishes… Thirty-seven… Wow.. I never thought this would be my life at that age… But that’s a chat for another day in my mushroom patch… Okay??) I’ve been wondering quite often…
I put up a strong front… a very strong wall. I take on a lot. I feel the problems of everyone around me and I try to sympathize and help everywhere that I think I can…
But am I really that person? Am I really that strong? Am I really strong enough to handle everything that I take on and tackle?
I think I may need to ponder this further because, as strong as I am… I’m not sure…
Don’t get me wrong; I know I’m strong, I’m talented, I’m smart, I’m a whole lot of everything rolled into a tiny package…
But I think on some levels I’m not quite strong enough for some of the things that keep getting handed to me and that I keep picking up and trying to work with.
Because perhaps those things are not my business to work with….
Perhaps some things are just best left alone…
Perhaps some things are not meant to be fixed…
And I think I’ll be truly wise the moment I can see those thing for what they are and then just let them alone.
Perhaps then I’ll have more strength than I know because I won’t be wasting my strength and energy trying to fix what is not mine to fix… Or what can’t be fixed… Or what shouldn’t be fixed…
Perhaps then I’ll truly be able to see my own strength once I stop squandering it on things that aren’t in my best interest to squander my efforts on.