So I have to say first and foremost; Wee and I are having a BLAST. This weekend has been so much fun… And really, it’s brought us closer together.
We’re not spending a million dollars. We’re not travelling to new and exotic places. We’re not even really doing anything exciting. What we are doing though is rolling it all back to the basics and just spending time.
It’s been amazing.
I love her so much. She really is an amazing little girl. So full of compassion and empathy… and FUN! She is so fun!
And then we had a visitor.
I knew the visitor was coming. I invited her out. But I didn’t EXPECT her to actually come out.
But she did.
And she brought with her news and stories that I know all too well.
I think she was going to try to pass everything off as ‘being great’… but then I think she saw me seeing… I think she saw me listening and hearing…. I think she saw me knowing before she said a word.
My poor sister has gotten divorced.
The absolutely wonderful man who she had met, fell in love with, and married… well, he claims that he decided he just couldn’t do it anymore. He says that he decided that he had had enough. He states that he decided that the weight of her illness was far too heavy for him to bear any longer.
So he cut all ties; even the ones that she had with his children.
And she’s left…. Broken. Absolutely broken.
She misses him horribly. Misses the children. Misses the life that they had.
She’s been shattered by someone who meant well; but who just couldn’t bear the weight of their own past and the future that they were trying to build.
Hm, sounds familiar.
She then told me of his exit strategy; make everything her fault so that she felt perfectly small. Everything. Right down to the tumour that he knew about long before they said ‘I do’. Somehow that tumour is her fault.
Hm…. that sounds familiar too.
That all sounds a lot like where I have been.
It sounds a lot like the shit I’ve had to swim through.
Why are there so many broken people out there in the world? And why do they insist upon tearing up everyone who tries to love them?
Why can’t they just gracefully say you know what, I made a mistake. I’m so sorry. So very sorry.
Why must they make everything everyone else’s fault, point out every flaw that everyone has, tear them down, tear them up, and leave them broken?
Why must people behave badly?
ourlifeouradventures 
That’s sad 😦 but beautifully written, as always 🙂
Thank you Nate… yes, it is sad…. so very sad… Everything has changed about the world… including the way people end a relationship. It used to be enough to just say hey, sorry… and walk away. Now most people feel the need to tear the other person up on the way out; leaving them feeling small and broken; as if the broken from the ending of a relationship isn’t enough pain to deal with.
I know both pains well… Sorry about your sister, that just sounds terrible, but you do have a kind and comforting way about you that I’m sure will help her with the healing process. Ugh, relationships eh? 😉
Relationships are great… when they’re good… when they go to hell, they can definitely tear your world up… leave you gasping for air… leave you feeling like you’ve been shattered into a million pieces. When that happens, all you can do is hope that those near and dear to you will catch you and carry you until you’re able to walk on your own again.
I hope that my sister sees and knows that, despite everything; or maybe because of everything; i’m here to help her…. help carry her. I hope. But that’s up to her. You can’t make someone accept your help any more than you can make someone love you.